Welcome to the extra special sleep deprived edition of the Think Banned Thoughts blog! In a magical world I went to bed at 3am last night and got to sleep in until 7am thanks to the time change. In reality though I think the time changed before I fell asleep, which means that I actually went to bed at 4am. So, I’m on three hours of sleep here. Please forgive the typos!
I was up last night trying to magically sort out “life, the universe and everything”. Despite Douglas Adams’s assertion that the answer is 42, I have my doubts. It’s interesting because I am living the dream, at least a dream. This past year has truly been magic. I have made wish after wish and they have been granted. Yes, I’ve had to work for them all, but the work paid off. Yes, I’ve had to fight for them, but the battles were won. I am at a point where I have almost everything I claim to want. So… now what?
I’ve never been very good at that whole Buddhist, Zen state of not striving. My father used to have a bumper sticker that said “I am not a human being, I am a human becoming.” I’ve always thought that was the point, to continue becoming, to continue growing and changing and adventuring and exploring and learning. And I haven’t stopped any of that, but I am on a bit of a plateau here. So I’m looking around and deciding what next. But what I really need is to take a minute and look around and just be. Just enjoy. Just relax and celebrate reaching this minor peak. I need to stop striving, just for a little while.
Be Here Now, fully present, in this moment. Breathe. Look at my amazing family. Look at the amazing state that I have returned to with them. Look at my amazing job that I managed to find and land in this ridiculous economy! Check out this crazy blog that lets me spew sleep deprived attempts at wisdom into cyber-land. Life IS Good. So what am I worried about? What am I striving for? Can I really be this blissed out and still want more?
Sure, I can want more, I can work for more, I can earn more. More what? Well, more adventure, more chances to learn and grow and change and become. But right now, I think I’ll just sit back and enjoy the view that I’ve earned so far. I must say, the air up here is awfully sweet. I think I might just stay a while.